I apologise that this isn't really a post about 'penny pinching' but this issue has been around the media today in response to research just out that controversially suggests, 'babies should sleep in mother's bed until age three.' So everyone seems to have something to say about this from the TV, to the papers and the social networking sites , and anyone with access to a computer who can comment on these sites. I've seen some comments today that have rather shocked and even upset me. So I felt compelled to share my own thoughts on the subject. Those of you who read my facebook page will see that we've had a nice friendly discussion on there today but I wanted to go in to a little more detail than facebook would allow...
I didn't think I was the type to co-sleep, I'm a restless sleeper and it took me long enough to get used to sharing my bed with my other half never mind a baby too! I also used to be quite a heavy sleeper, but I think that changes when you have children, I now wake up completely just from hearing my son cough in his sleep in the other room!
With Ben I never considered co-sleeping, he was never a bad sleeper really, and was sleeping through from a few months old. Like me, he was a very wriggly sleeper and when he was poorly and came into bed with us for hugs I could never sleep at all as he used to constantly kick me, I often waited for him to go to sleep then left him with Daddy and went off to sleep in his bed!
However things were rather different with my daughter. When Elizabeth was born she was a very clingy baby and never settled properly in her moses basket. (We still have M&P moses basket that has been slept in twice!) The only way she was comfortable sleeping was with me, and unless I was happy to sit or stand up all night holding her then the only way I was going to get any sleep was bringing her in to the 'big' bed with us. I have to admit I quite liked it, It felt special that we were inseparable for those first few weeks. As the weeks wore on it became apparent that this worked for us so we moved the unused moses basket out of the room and got a Co-Sleeper cot which slides up against the bed and provides extra space (although I have to admit she doesn't spend much time actually in it!)
As the months passed the inevitable question started to be asked by other mums.... 'Does she sleep through yet?' When I answered, 'no she still feeds a few times during the night' I would get pitying looks until I followed up with, 'But she doesn't really disturb me much as we co-sleep' The pity turned to surprise and disapproval and I even had some quite upsetting comments implying I was putting my baby in unnecessary danger!
This upset me and It became one of those pieces of information I didn't volunteer, If directly asked I would gladly admit that we shared a bed, but I would tend to avoid the topic if it looked like it was being approached. (I guess it's a little bit like admitting to still breastfeeding my daughter at almost 1 but that's another story...)
Today I have read a lot of ill-informed and ignorant comments surrounding this subject and it shouldn't surprise me in this country where not only is the topic jumped upon by the media at every opportunity as a 'dangerous act of irresponsible parents', but even those who we rely up for advice such as midwives or health visitors are 'officially' against it. But why is this? In the majority of cultures around the world co-sleeping is the norm until a baby is weaned from the breast, and in some such as Japan it is normal practice for a family to sleep together until the teenaged years. Although the National childbirth Trust recognises that if safely done it can be beneficial for nursing mothers to share a bed with their babies, the FSID still advices against it.
Should it not be up to a mother to make an informed decision on how and where she feels is best for both her and her child to sleep?
There are of course situations where co-sleeping can be dangerous and parents need to be made aware of these, but not in the form of scaremongering.
Dare I say this attitude that the UK as a whole has towards co-sleeping makes me wonder whether there is a connection to us having one of the lowest breastfeeding rates in this country?
My daughter is approaching one and I am proud to say she was in the just 1 per cent of babies in this country who were exclusively breastfed at six months old, she is still breastfed and will be until she is ready to wean. However I cannot confidently say that we would be in the same situation if we were sleeping separately and I had to get up to feed her multiple times every night. Unfortunately I was not as successful with feeding Ben and resorted to formula at 3 months (a decision I have since regretted) For myself and Elizabeth co-sleeping has definitely helped our breastfeeding journey.
Don't get me wrong Co-sleeping is not for everyone, it is a personal choice and if a mother is uncomfortable sleeping with her baby then neither of them are going to have a good nights sleep. But for breastfeeding mothers, who don't smoke, drink or take medication it is an option that should not be dismissed just because this country has a negative attitude towards it. The research that has grabbed the media's attention today suggests that babies and mother's get a better nights sleep together, that they bond better and even that brain development can be affected negatively by separation when sleeping apart. I cannot comment on the brain development side of things but I can certainly say that both myself and Elizabeth get a better nights sleep than we would if we were separated.
There are some negatives of course, but they are relative. I have now learnt to fit my body into a very limited space between my diagonal daughter and curled up husband. And speaking of the 'other half,' sharing our bed with a little person does limit our 'personal' time together but we manage...
I believe that co-sleeping can be safe if done correctly, and although it is not suited to every family, for some it can provide a better nights sleep, can help with a difficult breastfeeding journey and can be the right choice for both mother and child...
Competition now closed!
And the very lucky winner is..... Laura Bullivant!
Congratulations Laura!
Please email your contact details and required size to mymummyspennies@gmail.com and I will pass them onto the lovely folks at Green Nippers and arrange to have a lovely Vanilla Star babygrow sent out to you!
Thank you to everyone who entered! Have you entered the latest Mymummyspennies Competitions?
As you will know I like to feed my family organic food and I also try to use organic products where possible. We have recently discovered some great organic skincare brands but I have to say that until now I did struggle to find funky organic clothing for my children.
Then I discovered the fantastic Green Nippers! They are a fabulous new brand that have proven that organic can be colourful! Green Nippers have created bright and lively colour palettes using 100% natural, chemical-free, organic dyes. The dyes have a low-impact on the environment and are certified under Global Organic Textiles standard!
Green Nippers are an ethical, eco-conscious, organic baby and children’s clothing label. All Green Nippers products are certified by the Soil Association too.
Organic cotton clothes are kinder to babies with sensitive skin and those suffering from eczema. There are no harmful chemicals or pesticides in the fabric that can irritate babies delicate skin.
The Green Nippers collections include girls, boys and unisex organic baby clothes and matching organic baby accessories. As well as their fabulous new collection of girls and boys organic children’s clothes from 0 to 5 years.
We were sent a lovely Polly Pintuck baby grow from the girls organic baby clothes collection for Elizabeth to wear. This adorable little all in one outfit features a cute pin tucked detail, double sleeves, and an envelope neck. It is lovely and bright and the short sleeves and cool organic cotton makes it perfect for playing in the garden on a warm summers day (if we have any in this country!) and it looks just as cute teamed with a co-ordinating pink or yellow cardigan on cooler days!
When we received the package I was quite surprised at the colours of the fabric, they really are as bright as the pictures on the website! I loved the soft and thick feel of the organic cotton and could immediately see that this was a very good quality item. There are so many added little details that really make this outfit stand out, such as the double layered sleeves and the pink pin tucked knee patches!
I washed this before trying on my daughter and was pleased to find that it washed very well, did not shrink at all and the colours stayed vibrant.
The sizes are quite generous which is fantastic on a cloth bummed baby like Elizabeth as it was not tight around her nappy as some clothing ranges can be. It also means there is room to grow and it will last that bit longer, which is great for saving pennies!
The nickel free popper fastenings are easy to use but secure enough so that curious little hands cannot undo them!
Elizabeth is nine months and just starting to crawl around so the lovely pink pin tucked knee patches are perfect for giving her knees that extra protection while also looking very pretty!
This is a really lovely girly looking outfit as well as being very practical and comfortable for Elizabeth to wear! It's perfect for a 'play date' when I want to dress my little girl up but it also lets her play freely and comfortably when a dress may have been restricting!
I have now washed this quite a few times and it still looks as good as new!
The Polly Pintuck Babygrow is available from www.greennippers.co.uk in sizes from 0-12 months (0-3 and 3-6 have feet) and costs £24.99. Although this sounds a lot for a babygrow, it really is a full outfit that is extremely cute, very good quality, washes well and is very generously sized so will last longer than the three months you usually get from baby clothes! It would also make a perfect gift for any baby girl!
You can find this and all the other cute and funky outfits Green Nippers offer on their website here. You can also follow Green Nippers on Twitter and Facebook to be kept up to date with the latest news and offers...
The lovely people at Green Nippers are offering one lucky Mymummyspennies reader the chance to win their choice of a girls or boys organic baby grow from their Debut Collection.
To enter to win this fantastic prize you must:
- Like Mymummyspennies on Facebook
- Like Green Nippers on Facebook
- Pop over to Green Nippers website and choose your favourite baby grow
- Come back here and leave a comment stating your favourite and a way of contacting you (eg fb name, twitter id or email)
For up to 3 extra entries:
- share this competion on Facebook or Twitter by copying 'I entered to win a @GreenNippers Organic Babygrow with @Mymummyspennies'
- follow Mymummyspennies on Google Friend connect or Networked Blogs
- follow@Mymummyspennies on Twitter
(Please leave a separate comment for each extra entry)
The competition will close on 18th September at 9pm and the winner will be chosen by random draw.
t's and c's
- winners will be selected by random draw
- open to residents of UK only.
- Facebookis in no way affiliated with this competition.
- If the winners do not contact me within 3 days of their name being chosen another winner will be drawn.
- Competition will close 9pm 18th September 2011.
- Only entries that have complied with the rules of entry will be valid.
