Tuesday 23 August 2011

Nine months on, nine months off??

So I've never been particularly skinny but i've always been quite comfortable with my 'normal' pear shaped, size 12 body.
That was until I started having children! During my first pregnancy I put on quite a bit of weight and it took a while and quite a few failed diets for me to get back from a size 16 - 18 to a weight I was comfortable with. One of my main motivations when I finally managed to keep to a diet (with the help of Rosemary Conley diet and fitness classes) to shed the pounds (and stones!) was that we wanted to try for another baby and I wasn't going to put either my or my baby's health at risk by getting pregnant while so heavily overweight. It was around Christmas 2009 (over two years after I had given birth to my son) that I was eventually back to a figure I was happy with and even proud of!

For a few months I was able to wear figure hugging clothes and it gave me a lot more confidence in all aspects of my life! I found it easier to talk to people and even made some Mummy friends at playgroups which I had failed to do when my son was younger. I was a 'different' person and was able to be a lot more active with my toddler too!

Within 3 months of hitting my target weight, I was pregnant again, which was fantastic news! This time I was going to keep active and eat more healthily during pregnancy. Although I wouldn't be calorie counting I was determined not to be 'eating for two!'. I was able to stay quite active until close to the end (well I was running around after a two year old!) and didn't feel I had put on an excessive amount of weight.

After having my beautiful daughter I knew I had some weight to lose but didn't feel in any hurry, It had taken me nine months to put it on, so I thought why not allow myself nine months to lose it? I was exclusively breastfeeding her and was planning on doing so for at least the first six months so I knew I couldn't really go on a low calorie diet and risk her not getting enough nutrition from me.

As the weeks and months crept up on me I realised that instead of gradually losing the weight as I had planned, I was actually putting more on. I was being as active as I could but with a demanding pre-schooler and a baby who was feeding on demand and seemed to be attached to my nipple 24/7, It was hard to find time to myself to do an exercise DVD or even an hour on the Wii. I was walking a lot, to the park and playgroups but as I had a three year old in tow it was quite slow paced and just wasn't enough.

I love breastfeeding my daughter, nothing can match the bond that it has given us, I still feed her and will continue to do so until she no longer needs it. However one 'benefit' of breastfeeding I have never experienced is the weight loss. I hear so many mums saying how feeding has helped them get their figure back within months, but for me all it did was give me an insatiable appetite! I'm sure I can't be alone in this? Even now when Elizabeth is on 3 solid meals a day and doesn't take as much milk from me I am always hungry! I am by no means discouraging breastfeeding, I truly believe that if it is possible for you to breastfeed it is the best start in life you can give a child and the health benefits to the mother are a fantastic bonus.

I don't eat what would be classed as an 'unhealthly' diet, I just seem to need to eat a large amount satisfy my ridiculous appetite.

Elizabeth turned nine months at the weekend and it gave me a wake-up call. Instead of being back to my 'pre-pregnancy' weight, as I had planned to be at this point, I have put on over a stone and a half since I gave birth nine months ago.

I knew I would not be like the Celebrity 'Yummy Mummies' we see in the 'glossy magazines' who are back in their skinny jeans within weeks thanks to cabbage soup and expensive personal trainers but I thought that by this point I would look and feel like 'me' again.

I am now back at the biggest I have ever been and I have to admit that it makes me unhappy. I can't run after my almost 4 year old son as much as I could even a year ago when I was 6 months pregnant. I now wear big baggy clothes to hide in and cover myself up rather that show off my body. I know I need to do something about it and it has taken me nine months to face up to that. This post is marking the end of me burying my head in the sand and the start of me getting back to a woman that I can look at in the mirror, a Mummy that can chase her children around the garden and a wife that is proud to be seen out with her husband and family. I know it will be hard but I will get there.

I have found it really difficult to write this and I have actually stopped a few times. I usually write about shopping, or my children or even products we use and how I feel about them. This is my first post about me and I am quite scared to 'click' publish and share it with the world but I am going to...

This post has been chosen as the second guest post over on www.smallstepsonline.co.uk check it out here and please leave your feedback! 


  1. Good for you, it is a specific place you can point at which generally means there is a change coming, go for it.

  2. i have to say you are not alone with the appetite i dont think i ate this much when i was pregnant, i am in the same boat and intend to join weight watchers and go to aqua aerobics as soon as i can detach my 6 month old from my boob good luck hun xx


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